Wednesday, February 18, 2009

I love funny...

Funny, to me, is being shoved into awkward situations that (if you had the guts to speak up) you should be able to avoid.

Case in point: BMI testing at Oz.









For us ladies, I probably don't have to go into detail. But I will because my ranting will make me feel better.

First of all, all I wanted was a membership to Oz so I could partake in the awesome workouts with fellow TriFusionites and not be afraid that the roof will fall on my head or that one of only 5 treadmills will work or that maybe I'll catch some funky disease from the carpeted bathroom floors at Global. What I forget is that these Oz people are all about UPSELL, UPSELL, UPSELL!! So why not try upselling me on the idea of a personal trainer by "making" me have my BMI done? I mean, what could be more motivating?


So I am led back to this small cubicle of a room (which hides nothing, by the way) to discuss my goals and what-not. Then Mr. Sam pulls out this green pincher looking thing...what the hell?! He explains where he needs to pinch (pinch?!) and that's when I realized I wasn't going to like the outcome of this
visit.











First my tri's...then my back...and then the dreaded love handle and my favorite, the bellybutton portion of the tire I love to lug around...yes, I even asked if this part was necessary. Then my tree trunk of a thigh...the best part though, is when he said, "Ok, now I need your chest."





"Um, what?"

"I mean, your calf."

Whew. That was close.

So after the torture was done, he seemed a wee bit unconcerned about the numbers. This makes me question the accuracy of this pinch test. I know the BMI calculators online are sketchy but how accurate can this pinch thing be?

So I really don't know where I'm at on this BMI thing. According to Weight Watchers, I'm obese...teehehee...that's dumb. But according to Mr. Sam, I'm average...which I chuckle at as well. So I took both percentages and averaged them out...this seemed to be more accurate in my mind as I don't see myself as "average" or "obese" but right in the middle of the two.

I'm ok with this...for now.



But! I'm now a member of our so coveted Oz Fitness!

6 comments:

Steve said...

Welcome to the cult of the Northside. Hope to see you at some workouts soon.

Funny post BTW.

Tiffany said...

Ha ha! I joined Oz like 4 years ago to tone up a bit before my wedding. Of course, they talked me into the whole trainer bit too. I still vividly remember when he pulled out the pinchers! I was mortified! The best part was when he said, "You're lucky your arms and legs are so skinny because that's the only thing keeping the percentage low." Um, thanks, I think?

Can't wait to see you in the pool!

M-Dot said...

Ya pinchers suck and no one knows what it's like when there's actual real meat on the bones.
I remember too it sucked. Average is good who wants to be like the norm for our era.
Glad to see yiou came to the darside of things haha.

Hope you are well

M&J

Matt said...

welcome to Oz, glad to see ya swimming with us, even though it took a roof collapsing to get ya here, your here now so..

Anonymous said...

That's Great! It's not my favorite place but the base is to far since I live in Mead. We should workout together sometime. I really need to get my BMI in check. :) Hope to see you there! -Cindie

Michael W. Bergquist said...

Funny stuff ... now I need your chest. Ha ha ha. Anyway, it was a good read.